Letting Our Light Shine

So, it's not been terribly easy to find time to update this blog lately. Also, I've had a few setbacks that have kept me from writing - I hate to just post negative stuff. But, to sum up the last couple of weeks, I came down with a fever early last week that knocked me out completely for a couple of days. Turns out, I developed mastitis in my left breast (see link for more info). That, combined with the fact that Owen still hadn't returned to his birth weight, put a wrench in the breast feeding for a little while. We HAD to give him a bottle, though I did (and am still doing) my very best to fill those bottles with breast milk instead of formula as much as possible.

Fortunately, my mom arrived last Wednesday, just as I was coming back to life from the fever, and she has been SO helpful, I can't even put it into words. To top things off, Seattle has experienced it's hottest heat wave in 30 years and even set a record yesterday, with highs in the triple digits. For my family in the midwest, before you balk at what weenies we are, keep in mind that only about 15% of the homes out here have air conditioning, and ours is not one of them. Fortunately, Ryan was able to stand in line outside Target yesterday morning and nabbed one of only 8 window a/c units that arrived the night before, so at least our kitchen is cool! : )

Since then, we've experimented with all kinds of different things - nursing, pumping, formula, scheduling, on-demand, swaddling, etc. As of last Friday, Owen had regained his birth weight, and then some, so at least something we did was right! Now, we're still working on finding the right balance that's going to work for our family. As of right now, it's looking like nursing, as an exclusive means of feeding for Owen, is not going to be an option. This saddens me more than I can ever express in words, so I will just leave it at that. And I am hesitant to move to a strictly formula-based diet yet (I really feel that Owen should reap the benefits of breast milk for as long as possible), so I am going to continue pumping as much as I can and giving it to him through a bottle. But I know that I am just not producing enough to meet his demand (which is ever increasing), so I will need to supplement with formula from time to time. And that will probably only increase as time goes on as well.

I guess when life hands you lemons, you make lemonade.

My mom leaves tomorrow morning and I am extremely sad to see her go. Mostly I'm afraid to not have her here - her helpful suggestions, her ability to see the bigger picture, her seemingly endless energy, her cleaning and cooking, her love for Owen, and just HER...to talk to and cry with. I wish she could stay forever, but I know that I need to figure this all out on my own eventually. So, that's what I'm going to do. Please pray for me - I really need it!

Here are some pics...will post more soon.